Bentley doesn't make an SUV. Though they've contemplated and toyed with the idea, the boys in Crewe ultimately decided against it. Sure, some of their sedans and coupes are roughly the size of trucks, with engines of similar proportions and torque output, but they hardly fulfill the same purpose as a sport-ute. So what's a guy to do? Well, most would pick up a Range Rover, frankly. Or a Q7 from Bentley sister-brand Audi. Badges aside, even a VW Touareg V10 TDI would fit the bill. But one driver apparently didn't like any of those ideas, so he had his own Bentley SUV made up. Er, sorta.

The abomination you see above is actually based on – yep, you guessed it – a HUMMER. Yes, it's horrible, but don't blame us. We're only the messengers. And just where might you stumble upon such misplaced gluttony? You'd be forgiven for thinking it was in Russia, where that hideous Cayenne/Touareg resides, but only if you couldn't tell the Arabic alphabet from the Cyrillic: this unfortunate embodiment of 'too much money, not enough taste' comes straight out of new-money Dubai. Click on the images in the gallery below to see more, if you must.